Polishing of 20 years..

It's June 1st. Which means I have 13 days left of being 20. I'm really, really, really young but a lot of life has happened. This past year life has changed, I lost friends, I've changed...it's been hard. Really hard. But despite this all it's been a learning process. Just like most of life goes.

I've learned that despite all my effort to love someone the way I think they want to be loved....sometimes it isn't enough. There's someone who I really hurt and I know I did but as selfish as this might sound.....I had to do what was best for me. I truly hurt because that person is hurt, but where is the line between protecting someone and doing something that is right for you?

Life is hard. It sucks sometimes. But for every sucky time there is a brighter one just up ahead...

I just needed to type this out... to an empty audience but nonetheless its helpful.

SCHOOL IS OUT SCREAM AND SHOUT!

After a terribly difficult 6 weeks of 3 summer classes....I AM FREE. Till mid August at least... So happy to be done with classes. Now I am focusing on preparing myself to head to Honduras in just a couple weeks! I am headed down to Central America to work in a safe home for victims of sex trafficking. The lives I am about to meet and the testimonies I will hear are something I don't think I will ever be prepared for.

My heart has been set on people who need help. The Bible speaks many times about helping other, either neighbors or strangers. Everyone is entitled to help and more importantly, love. This is going to sound crazy to say, but I can not wait to be completely wrecked by these people. I pray that I will be able to help to these girls that I will be meeting, but I also can't wait to have them impact my life.

"Yet not I, but the grace of God that was with me." // 1 Corinthians 15:10

I pray that I am a testament to this verse. That it was never me but the will and spirit of the Lord that is greater than I. 

Walk around yo' city

I live in beautiful and historic Downtown Saint Augustine, which (fun fact) is the city I've dreamt of living in ever since I was in 7th grade. I am a resident of Lincolville which is filled with a TON of history. (Another fun fact) Martin Luther King, Jr. once walked the streets of Lincolville as a peace rally. I have so much history right at my door step, yet I don't acknowledge it very often.

The other day, I took a stroll around town with two friends. We started off by going to get a cup of coffee which continued into trespassing into a building and trying to access their roof (...no luck...needed a key) then went into Flagler and tried accessing the solarium (also no luck...there was an event up there that night) and then it ended going to the top of the Lightner Museum and watching the sky turn colors.

I guess the point of this is just a reminder to acknowledge your surroundings. Something as a simple walk through the neighborhood reminded me of the reason why I chose to live in St. Augustine and why I continue to. I love this town far beyond it's history. I don't think I will ever love a city more than my beloved St. Augustine. I have grown and learned so much during my time here. I cherish this town far beyond my words could explain. It is humbling to me the thought that living in this town was never really apart of my plan but more of the Lord's plan for me. I was meant to live here. My heart will always be in St. Augustine.

Another year down

I AM NOW A JUNIOR IN COLLEGE! 

I can't believe it. This year was freaking rough. From moving into my first apartment to taking six classes to quitting my job at Harley and being trained in coffee...My life has been a bit of a whirlwind. Now I'm on summer vacation for exactly 12 days then I start 3 summer classes...


Life is cool and I'm blessed to be doing it with these gals.

unscripted

Life tends to get a bit chaotic and overwhelming and time consuming and...many many other things, but despite all of the craziness life is so wonderful. Everyday I see students walking briskly up and down the streets either on their penny boards or their vespas. Some students are wearing their bathing suit and no shoes while others are wearing the latest fashion trend.. you may be wondering where i'm going with this.. what I'm trying to say is that despite it all life is unscripted, and the thought of that drives me insane.

I am 100% a planner. I love to color code. I love to open my agenda and see that I have meetings and deadlines. Call that the teacher in me if you will but whatever that's how I am. I would rather a day filled back to back with meetings then a day sat on the couch.. although I do appreciate those days every now and then. I don't know.. I just love the constant movement in my days, but I have to say that the things I love the most are the moments I didn't plan. The moment where I run into someone I haven't seen in a while, or when I get an encouraging text message from someone I admire, or when i'm walking to class and it starts to rain just a little bit but the sun is shining so brightly. Those moments make those crazy, hectic days that much better.


xoxo
k

Changes

i'm sorry if my blog tends to get repetitive at times.. i seem to be in a state of nostalgia.

This week my youth group from high school is at camp, and this is the first year where I am not in attendance. It is a strange feeling to be independent.. i've always been an independent child but now I truly am. I move into my first apartment in 9 days (!!!) and I will be starting my sophomore year of college in just a short 2 months.. So much has happened in a year, I didn't even have a glimpse at all the Lord had in store for me but boy oh boy is it amazing. The people and community He has led me to, the town, the experiences.. it's all been more than I could ever imagine. The biggest thing I've realized is my relationship with Him and how much it has grown in just a short year. I can't help but sit back and be amazed.

What an ever loving, ever knowing God, friends. I am so in love with Him.


If all of this has happened in an year, I can't even begin to imagine what the next year has in store for me.

Stay tuned, friends.


xoxo

K

sunday morning

This morning I woke up with full intentions of going to church. I woke up got ready and headed that way. Once I got there I saw that the church was actually meeting in homes instead of the church and I proceeded to head to my favorite coffee shop for some quiet time. I get there, ordered a hot aussie, and sat at my favorite table outside of the shop. A man and his girlfriend approached me and asked if they could sit with me, this made me think of my English professor who encouraged us to sit with strangers at quaint places, such as a coffee shop. I told the man he was more than welcome to join me and he did. At first we were both quiet but I then broke the ice by asking if they were visiting the town for the weekend. His girlfriend tells me they are locals and we begin to talk about Flagler. They asked me if I was a student and the man told me he was an alumni. We talked for about half an hour about the town, the school, and the people of St. Augustine. He shared his heart and love for the town and school with me. The man and his girlfriend left, we didn't even exchange names, but the conversation was something so close to me that I don't think I could have had a better Sunday morning. They left and I began my quiet time and I have to say, it was the best Sunday morning I've had in a while.

"Therefore, I will praise you, Lord, among the nations; I will sing the praises of your name." // Psalm 18:49

in the quiet

I'm sitting in my dorm room, my roommate is fast asleep, 6:33 pm, I am listening to the Hillsong- Worship album on Spotify...

"With everything. With everything. I will shout forth your glory."

How good is our God friends. He is magnificent, and glorious. The one to be in awe and fear. The one who is always so so close. A God so loving and so caring that my mind can't be wrapped around it. 

Sometimes.. in the quiet.. like now.. i feel very close and very much in His presence. In the moments where my inspirations is through the roof and I feel as if I am being fed all the creativity and imagination.. I know it's because of Him. He allows me to create and to love. 

"My heart is overtaken. My heart is overwhelmed."

I love being reminded of how blessed I am. The humbleness that is so overwhelming I just want to sit back and cry. The fact that I live in such a beautiful town.. sweet St. Augustine.. I can't believe how blessed I am. To be studying the one thing my heart is so for.. the fact that one day I will have my own classroom and loving on such beautiful children.. wow. My God. How beautiful are you. 

"My hope is built on nothing else than Jesus' blood and righteousness." 

"And now, O Israel, what does the LORD your God ask of you but to fear the LORD your God, to walk in all his ways, to love him, to serve the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul,  and to observe the LORD's commands and decrees that I am giving you today for your own good?  To the LORD your God belong the heavens, even the highest heavens, the earth and everything in it.  Yet the LORD set his affection on your forefathers and loved them, and he chose you, their descendants, above all the nations, as it is today.  Circumcise your hearts, therefore, and do not be stiff-necked any longer.  For the LORD your God is God of gods and Lord of lords, the great God, mighty and awesome, who shows no partiality and accepts no bribes.  He defends the cause of the fatherless and the widow, and loves the alien, giving him food and clothing.  And you are to love those who are aliens, for you yourselves were aliens in Egypt." // Deuteronomy 10:12-19

Conviction.

It has been a while since I have wrote a blog post much like this one, so let's try this again.

Why is it that we feel convicted to do things? Why is it that when you see a homeless person on the street you hurt for them, and put yourself into their shoes? The way they must be cold and alone. Why is it when you hear of children going unfed for days, you feel hungry to feed them? And most importantly, why is that when you ask the Lord to "break your heart for what breaks His" He ACTUALLY DOES IT.

Okay, that last one might be redundant because you are asking to have your heart broken. I guess I mean as why do I feel so much when sometimes I don't want to feel at all? I have been struggling a lot with these feelings that I so do not want. But to be what I know the Lord wants of me I will deal with these unwanted feelings with the help a God who is Almighty and Sovereign.

The church that the Lord has blessed me with here in Saint Augustine has introduced me to this song. I find myself singing it often times. 

"And I will call upon Your name

And keep my eyes above the waves

When oceans rise

My soul will rest in Your embrace

For I am Yours, and You are mine"

I am Yours, and You are mine. Wow, truer words have never been written. In world that is so lost we are comforted constantly. In a world where it is so easy to get caught up in things, we are convicted to continue on the path the Lord has laid out for us. Why is it that this world is so appealing to our human nature. Why is it that we want to be accepted by society so badly? 

I have a lot of questions today friends.

xoxo

K

Life update.

Oops.. I keep putting off writing on here and I keep wanting to do it but I forget.. or something else comes in between. BUT I'm writing now so here we go!

Since my last post from July 4th weekend (yikes..it's been a long time) I have moved away from the town I grew up in and where my family and friends reside to a town 2 1/2 hours north called, Saint Augustine and I am attending the school of my dreams and I live in a dorm where I have roommates and suitemates and wow things have changed y'all.


Since moving to STA, I have:

• gotten a car
• saw mumford and sons, edward sharpe and the magnetic zeros, the vaccines, and more (GOTR festival!)
• saw the lumineers!!
• made new friends
• been inspired beyond on words
• started college classes
• and i'm currently learning how to be on my own

I can't even describe to you how much has happened and how much i've grown in the 3 months i've been here.. I can't even imagine how much the Lord will teach me in the 4 YEARS i'll be spending here!

I need to make my own post about seeing mumford and sons.. I'll have to do that another day.

july 4th weekend

all photos from my fourth of july weekend. on the 4th i drove up to Madeira Beach with two really good friends, I stayed till the 7th. during those days we went to the beach, explored the little town of madeira and most importantly saw we the kings. i had the awesome opportunity of meeting 3/5 of the members, one of them being Charles Trippy who is CTFxC on YouTube.. and someone who I admire a lot. 

i had so much fun singing and dancing and just making a complete fool of myself on saturday.. definitely a weekend i will never forget. 

xoxo

growing up. and what comes along with it.

Friends, it's literally been forever since I've wrote to y'all. And since the last time we've spoke things have happened.

• Concerts
• Having a foreign exchange student move in
• Prom

and

• G R A D U A T I N G H I G H S C H O O L

Dude. That might seem like a short list, but trust me it was so much to handle. 2013 has literally been flying by considering tomorrow is the last day of May and it'll be officially June. I don't know where to begin. So instead I will share pictures. 

I can't even begin to explain how much I will miss high school. How much I will miss those hallways that I dreaded so much Monday mornings. How much I will miss hearing "Have a safe journey home" before the final bell. And how much I will miss seeing my best friends every day. 

As I have less than 2 months with some of my friends before we each go our separate ways or even some who are still in high school, I am learning to cherish each and every moment. Because sooner than I will expect it, it'll all just be a memory of the time I was in high school. 

xoxo

Valentines.

I have said it before and I will say it again. I'm definitely not one to be super lovey or i like to express my feelings all the times and valentines day is most DEFINITELY not one of my favorites. But this year something changed in me and I'm loving it. My sweet little pup Leo is turning 1 on Thursday and I am having friends over to bake, watch movies, and celebrate my pups little life.

This is Leo Messi in case you haven't seen him.

So anyway, I actually went out and bought little heart lanters for my room as well as the CUTEST Rifle Paper Co. Valentines cards for my sweet friends. I am so excited to give them out (actually I don't even want to do that because they're seriously the cutest). 

Life has been pretty crazy lately, Congres is exactly 3 weeks away (I blogged about last years Congres here), 2 months till I see Taylor Swift, oh! and I bought MUMFORD AND SONS TICKETS Y'ALL! I will be seeing my absolute favorite band in September in my utmost favorite city, SAINT AUGUSTINE! How this all came about is absolutely insane. I found out last week they were announcing their Gentlemen of the Road 2013 tour with a couple other awesome bands and one of the cities they chose this year is Saint Auggie! Not to mention this will be their FIRST time coming to Florida! I am so blessed to say I have tickets and that I will be attending with 2 of my best friends! It's going to be the best 2 days ever. 

Things have definitely been getting better since last year and I can already tell 2013 is going to be one of the best years I have yet to experience. 

In the mean time, I ask that you please pray for me while I am struggling through a class my senior year and as my senior year comes to an end. It's a scary thought but it's happening and soon enough I will be able to say that I am a high school graduate. Insane y'all.

"Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres" // 1 Corinthians 13: 6-7

xoxo,

K

been a while.

oops sorry friends i get so caught up in everything i have to do i forget to breathe and write sometimes.

this year is going by so fast, i can't believe it's already february. most importantly i can't believe it's 2013. i feel like this is what most of my posts have been about but well..this is what my life is concentrating on!

so here is a list of things that will be happening in this new year:

• Seeing Taylor Swift with two really great friends in April
• My second and final year of competing in Congres in March
• GRADUATING HIGHSCHOOL in May
• Starting COLLEGE (!!!) in August
• Moving to a new city
• Going to p.r.o.m.

so that doesn't seem like a lot but i'm sure other things will come up along the way.

i am also going to post some things i have been loving lately, because well..why not:

and a bunch of other stuff i don't have pictures for. till next time!

xoxo

2012 in a nutshell.

  2012 has definitely been a whirlwind year. I started at whole new school (and school system..), I have made new friends, I have lost friends, I grew closer to my sweet Lord, I started a blog, I became a senior in high school, I got accepted into my dream school!!  I have done a whole lot this year. I can't believe it's already coming to an end. I could have sworn it was December 31, 2011 and I was in my living room with my best friend and my brother and his friend and we were counting 3,2,1 into 2012.


  You know how when you get older people say that life will fly by...it is so true friends. I was just a freshmen in high school ! Dealing with silly things and now I am a senior getting ready to deal with financial aid and independent scholarships.. it's ridiculous. I don't know how I feel about it getting ready to be 2013, but I'm sure that the Lord will guide me through it.

that one time i dyed the bottom of my hair green...

although some friendships end others start again. new faces come into your life and sometimes these new ones stay for a while, or stay forever. 

I'm excited for this new year of hope and dreams coming true.. hope y'all are too.

xoxo

Merry Christmas Ya Filthy Animals!

Happy Christmas friends. Today is a day of laughter, family, friends, loves, gifts, much most importantly, the one who today is meant for.

‎"For unto us a child is born, to us a son is given;
and the government shall be upon his shoulder,
and his name shall be called Wonderful, Counselor, Mighty God, Everlasting Father, Prince of Peace." Isaiah 9:6

Our God sent His one and only Son to be born, in a manager and to live among us as human. He came down in the humblest way a King could ever come. We are blessed beyond measure. I am blessed beyond measure. 

Hope today was wonderful for you. 

xoxo